Discovering your limits and expanding your view
This week I had ACL surgery on my knee. In true irony, and what I like call my “klutz effect,” I managed to strain a muscle on the affected leg a few days before surgery, which resulted in some earlier than planned immobility. I had a long to-do list of work items to finish, house projects to finalize, and general preparations to get my family and business ready for my downtime. The universe had another idea. And, as I stared at my list, which would remain unchecked (at least by me), I was reminded of my early days returning to work after having my first daughter. I had negotiated a flexible working schedule and was leading major vaccine launches in the USA and I was determined to prove it could work not only for me but for the countless parents that negotiated for flexibility after me. I found myself in a place where even thinking felt hard at times. With some open discussions with a very authentic manager, I was able to summon my courage and admit some hard truths. I needed help.
And, much like today, asking for help for me still feels awkward and hard at times. It’s not about distrust of my team. It’s entirely around embracing that my worth is more than what I can deliver in that finite period of time. It’s about knowing that my value is bigger than a transaction. What I’ve learned every time I ask for and accept help is:
- People surpass your expectations. In both work and at home, I find the more I let control of things, the more that people around me not only step up, they go beyond what I dared to ask for. I’m reminded of how important it is to give the people that live and work with me the opportunity to grow. My five-year-old is ecstatic that she is now in charge of our cats’ welfare and has asked to take on more chores as home. (Fingers crossed for the cats that the enthusiasm continues! Ha!)
- Letting go often allows me to see more. When I let go of things, it almost feels like time freezes and I can suddenly see the minute details of the people and things around me from my 7-year-old daughter who can now carry on an adult-like conversation with her unique interests to recognizing my own accomplishments with my business as I reflect on the year. It gives me a new canvas to paint on so I can freely explore what I want more of and enjoy what I had not given myself a chance to see.
- Vulnerability increases connection. Today I had an open conversation with my husband about how I was feeling, which prompted him to share. We do not have the perfect plan to tackle the next few weeks, but I do know we are in it together and that feels ten times more comforting than the crazy spreadsheets I sometimes bury myself in to get ahead of the risks of what’s to come. And, not surprisingly, my corporate teams have always stepped up in the same way and brought new creativity to issues when I invite them to help.
As always, if you need help designing teams or cultures that embrace asking for and accepting help, do not hesitate to contact Livthentic for an exploratory discussion or schedule directly on calendly. I see your spark and want to help you grow it into a flame. You can also join our mailing list to stay in touch or follow us on Linkedin, Facebook, or Instagram.